Bring on the Joy!

Cindy Lopez:
Hi, I’m Cindy Lopez and I’m happy to welcome you to our Voices of Compassion podcast series where we hope you’ll find a little courage, some connection and a whole lot of compassion. We all know the holidays this year are going to be different. It’s hard to imagine the holidays without all the family and friends we usually gather with. As we are huddled in our own homes right now it feels so insular, but there are still so many ways to share the joy and cheer. So in today’s episode, we share some ideas with you about how to fill up your holidays with activities: some fun, some thoughtful and all good. My colleagues, Liza Bennigson, our Associate Director of Marketing and Communications, and Mike Navarrete, our Marketing Associate are joining me today. There are so many good ideas, it’ll take the three of us to make sure we’ve covered them all. So sit back and listen, we encourage you to select one or two of these ideas to help make your holidays full of joy and cheer.

Mike Navarrete:
Thank you Cindy and I’m so excited to be here. Before we begin, I just want to point out that these recommendations are coming from our own expert CHC staff, and we hope you enjoy.

Liza Bennigson:
Okay number one is set out on an evening drive with cocoa, cookies and carols to check out local light displays. And I love this one. There is a street in San Carlos where we live that just goes totally over the top with light displays, it’s called Eucalyptus Street. And I wasn’t sure if they would be as impressive as usual this year, but we headed there the other night and blasted the Christmas carols and I feel like they went even above and beyond what they usually do this year. There’s no way to not feel joy when you drive down that street.

Mike Navarrete:
There’s actually a town that I live by called Los Gatos and they put on a wonderful little light show that you can drive through during the holidays. It’s something that I always look forward to and I know with COVID, that could be a safe, activity for folks to check out. I think it’s also nice just to kind of break up our day-to-day routines, even if it’s just for a drive and even if you don’t have a destination per se. My dad and I last weekend just went out and got hot chocolate and just drove around and that was a really nice way to break up my day to day routine. And I work from home and I’m on the computer like a lot of people are right now, so it was nice, just to be with my dad and spend quality time with him and I love hot chocolate and it’s something I really look forward to so having a nice treat on the weekend and just getting out of the house was huge for my mental health. So I definitely recommend that.

Cindy Lopez:
So Mike, did you, did you and your dad’s in carols as you were driving?

Mike Navarrete:
Oh I don’t know if you want to hear me sing Cindy, I wish.

Liza Bennigson:
I feel like every neighborhood has just gone you know, over the top and is really putting on a good show. So you can really find it close to home this year.

Cindy Lopez:
That’s great. I love those ideas around the evening drive and the hot cocoa and looking at the lights. Mike, what’s the second one on our list?

Mike Navarrete:
So the second one that we have is host a quarantine potluck exchanging favorite comfort foods with no contact delivery.

Liza Bennigson:
That’s a fun one. Everybody can make their favorite meals and just make enough for several people. And then you drop off your side dish on everybody’s stoop, and it’s just sort of a way to connect with other people and you can even Zoom while you eat.

Mike Navarrete:
Yeah and I think that’s what we’re actually deciding on doing during the holiday season, is exchanging our favorite dishes with older people in our family that can’t necessarily join us during the holidays. So it’s also kind of comforting and fun preparing certain meals for them and dropping that off.

Cindy Lopez:
So next on our list would be to leave a holiday treat on neighbor’s porch with a note, encouraging them to pay it forward. Those are really fun things to do because it’s so unexpected. And I don’t know about you, but you don’t think your neighbor’s going to leave you something. It’s always so fun even to get a package, like when I get my Amazon packages on my doorstep, it’s fun. So, and I was just thinking the other day too, I often, when I’m in line at the grocery store, the lines seem to be rather long-ish these days and of course they feel longer because we’re all six feet apart standing in line. But I often just tell the person behind me that they can go in front of me. And they’re just floored that I would suggest that like really sure, are you sure? Yeah. And so it’s fun just to do things like that that are spontaneous and that don’t cost you anything.

Mike Navarrete:
Something that I did this year that I typically don’t do admittedly, is write holiday cards to family and friends and coworkers.

Cindy Lopez:
I got one of your cards. Thank you Mike!

Mike Navarrete:
Yeah and it’s something that when I receive, I feel like it’s so uplifting just to get something as small as a card in the mail. So even as something as small as that, exchanging a holiday card or you know a holiday treat. And it could just be to one person, it doesn’t have to be to a large group of people. I know that that can be really time-consuming for folks, but it’s something that I really enjoy getting. So I hope other people enjoy, enjoy that as well.

Liza Bennigson:
I love that. Mine must be in the mail Mike.

Mike Navarrete:
Yes, it’s on its way Liza.

Cindy Lopez:
I just got my card yesterday.

Liza Bennigson:
The next item on our list is donate money you would’ve spent on holiday travel to a local charity or food bank. And this is a great one to keep in mind. It is the year end and there’s so many charities just going above and beyond this year uh to help people there is more need maybe than ever. And people are really getting creative about how we can help each other. So just trying to support those organizations in your community that are helping people get through these hard times. I think that is an awesome way to spend the money that you would have normally spent on airfare or hotels.

Mike Navarrete:
If there’s any sort of organization that you can do something as small as you know, gathering some old clothes or, anything in your house that you don’t use and make a simple delivery. That’s also a way to get out of the house too, because a lot of us are just stuck at home. So it could be kind of a fun trip, to go and make a donation to one of your local favorite nonprofits.

Cindy Lopez:
So next in our lineup is to create new, meaningful family traditions, like making holiday cards for hospitalized children. As Mike just said, I mean, he just mentioned sending cards to people in the mail. You can imagine that when you get that you know, kind of as a little spontaneous, unexpected surprise in your everyday life, you can imagine that it would be that much more meaningful to kids who are hospitalized or our older population that is you know in skilled nursing or assisted living are even people who are, they’re just not leaving their house very much right now because they’re at risk in terms of COVID. So it’s always nice to receive some kind of fun, little note or whatever, and that it’s a kid made thing it’s even more fun.

Liza Bennigson:
And it’s so good for your kids to see you doing that and for them to participate as well. It’s just such a good message to send them that the world is not all about us. It’s about really making other people happy too, so I love that it’s a family tradition.

Mike Navarrete:
I think that’s also a way to teach our kids to be grateful, right, and practicing gratitude is something that we talk about here at CHC. When I was younger, my grandmother would love sending me handwritten cards in the mail. And you know, as a young kid I would never really think too much about doing the same. I mean, I would write cards from time to time when my parents told me to, but it’s nice to be able to practice that with your kids so at least they see you doing that. And I think like, as I got older, that’s something that I just wanted to do myself as opposed to someone telling me. So now I actually enjoy writing my grandmother cards and it makes me feel really, just appreciative and grateful that I still have her in my life. And a lot of folks don’t have a lot right now so if you can’t give like a family member a gift, it’s really nice to kind of show that token of appreciation and that can be like another form of a gift is just writing a card.

Liza Bennigson:
Totally. And we talked about people in nursing homes and you know, elder care facilities. And our next item touches on that. It’s deliver festive flowers, wreaths or plants to a nursing home to cheer up residents and staff. So it’s not just the elderly that need cheering up. There are people that are just working round the clock to keep everybody safe and healthy. And there’s nothing like the smell of a wreath or you know, some poinsettias or something to just cheer up that environment that could be really, really difficult right now. So another pretty easy, painless way to spread the joy.

Cindy Lopez:
Thanks Liza, that delivering flowers and stuff to skilled nursing homes is important, but I love the fact that you highlighted those essential workers that are the staff that’s there working to keep everyone safe and healthy. So, so far, just to recap for a minute, I just want to go back and say the ones that we have said. So set out on an evening drive with cocoa and cookies and maybe carols and check out the lights. Host a quarantine potluck, exchange favorite comfort foods with no contact delivery. Third, leave a holiday treat on a neighbor’s porch with a note, encouraging them to pay it forward. Fourth, donate money you would’ve spent on holiday travel to a local charity or food bank. And then create new and meaningful traditions, like making holiday cards for hospitalized children and the one Liza just mentioned deliver festive flowers, wreaths or plants to a nursing home to cheer up residents and staff.

So next on our list is along with your kids wishlist, encourage them to make a list of the things they’re grateful for. And this is especially meaningful to me because I’ve been reading a book over the years and I just kind of keep re-reading it and reading excerpts and passages again and that’s called One Thousand Gifts, and it’s this opportunity to really intentionally think about what you’re thankful for every day and each moment of every day. So it’s the celebration of grace and it’s really the power of gratitude. And I can’t tell you how many days that has changed my perspective and outlook, because I’ve been intentionally looking for things to be grateful for.

Liza Bennigson:
I love that. And it’s great to get the kids involved with that too. A lot of times this can be a time of wanting and circling lots of things in the uh catalogs that keep coming in the mail. But just reminding our kids that this time of year and every time of year is about much more than presents and what’s under the tree and goes a lot deeper than that. I know this year will be a financially difficult year for many of us, and so it’s even more important than ever to remind our kids that this time of year is about much more than presents.

Mike Navarrete:
We also have a wonderful podcast episode called Raising Compassionate Kids by two of our staff members at CHC, Kendra Fraka who is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Vibha Pathak, who is an Occupational Therapist. And they really talk about modeling sort of that kind of behavior where kids can really pick up on simple acts of being grateful, right. So it can be anything as far as making a list of what you’re grateful for and it doesn’t have to be um, like a full written out huge list, cause I know that’s kind of like a platitude and something that we hear quite often, but it could be something that you just really focus in on like one or two things and talk about that with your kids and model that. And I think that can be really nice.

Liza Bennigson:
So the next item on our list was inspired by a Netflix show called Nailed It, where people participate in a kind of a baking championship challenge. And the more complicated the better. This year you could add a holiday theme, it could be baking or crafts, but you basically find something on Pinterest that you’re pretty sure no one could even come close to creating and you make it a contest and then you share your results over text or you can Zoom during the whole thing, but it can be hilarious and I would highly suggest you know, the more complex, the better.

Cindy Lopez:
That would be so hilarious if I did that because I’m totally not a cook or a baker. And I always look for the simplest, like the fewest ingredients and the simplest recipes. And it always has to have a photo because I need to know what it looks like at the end. So…

Liza Bennigson:
Yes and you can still screw it up.

Cindy Lopez:
So that’s great. I love that idea.

Mike Navarrete:
Yeah. And I have a few friends that have been cooking more. And I’ve seen not just from my friends, but people on social media that have been coming up with these like amazing recipes and so it’s also kind of inspired me. I haven’t really been competitive with anyone, but I have been kind of experimenting and trying new recipes and that’s been something that I’ve been looking forward to during my free time.

Cindy Lopez:
Yeah, here’s another idea for everyone, is to create snow creatures out of marshmallows and toothpicks. Not only create those creatures, but to put them in your hot chocolate or your hot cocoa and let them melt away you know, kind of brings the whole frosty the snowman experience back. But it’s so funny because, not to keep dropping companies’ names, but Trader Joe’s has their melting snowman that they sell every year at this time. And I went looking for some last week at our local Trader Joe’s and they’re all sold out. So you may not be able to get them, but you can make your own. And um, it’s just fun cause it’s another way, especially with young kids to just kind of like, oh wow, I wonder how long it’s going to take for these marshmallow to melt or what does this remind you of you know, you could read the frosty story or watch the movie. And so anyway, it was just fun. It brings me back to my roots in early childhood and just a fun idea to share with your kids.

Liza Bennigson:
Just make sure you take the toothpicks out before you drink it.

Cindy Lopez:
Good point!

So the next one that we have on our list here is wave and smile beneath your mask to anyone that you see. And for me, this is really comforting when I see someone, when I’m outside of my house and I don’t go out too often but when I do and when I’m wearing my mask, whenever I see someone, just having like a really simple, nice, comforting gesture, as smiling or waving, it really does uplift my day, so I try to really make that a habit. And I find that is also something that I’m grateful for is having the privilege of being healthy and still being able to go out and see people. And so, it’s kind of like a reflective moment as well for me to kind of take like a deeper look at my life and just realize that there’s a lot for me to be grateful for. And it’s also really nice to, you know, be able to see other people out and about.

Liza Bennigson:
Okay. We have a few more ideas that are on our website. So please make sure you go check those out. I’m going to end with a fun one that I actually have planned for this Saturday night: host a virtual game night, festive attire encouraged. So I actually sent an invitation to some friends as though it were a real holiday party. It’s going to be over zoom and we’re using something called Jackbox Games. And I bought a subscription way back in March, early pandemic when Zoom hangouts were still fun. But it’s actually pretty hilarious and it’s kind of a great way to laugh and be together with the ones you love at least virtually, so Happy Holidays!

Cindy Lopez:
That’s great, thank you. Thanks Mike and Liza for doing this episode with me today, I think our listeners will find it uplifting and hopefully they’ll hear some ideas that they might be able to incorporate and be excited about incorporating in their own holiday activities this year. So happy holidays to you all.

Liza Bennigson:
Thanks Cindy

Mike Navarrete:
Thank you Cindy.

Cindy Lopez:
Find us online at podcasts.chconline.org. Remember that is podcasts with an s. Also, please follow us on our socials. Find us on Facebook @chc.paloalto and Twitter and Instagram at CHC_paloalto. You can also visit our YouTube channel at chconlinepaloalto. And we are on LinkedIn. Subscribe to Voices of Compassion on Apple podcasts, Spotify and other podcast apps, and sign up for a virtual village email list so you never miss an update or an episode. I always love to hear from you so send me an email or a voice memo at podcasts@chconline.org. Again, that is podcasts with an s. Or leave us a rating and review. We look forward to you tuning in each week. After all we are in this together. See you next week.